Monster in training

A poem inspired by my experiences on public transport…

My fellow commuters

If you were a beast,

What a strange one you would be!

Fish breathed and stinking of perfume,

straddled legged and hard kneed.

Slumping into slumber, while standing,

or comfortably on someones shoulder.

Rubbing your bottom against my shoulder

and fragrantly farting in my face.

Talking loudly to yourself

and turning the air blue,

Bleeding scarlet pinpoints on the floor.

Throwing yourself against the windows

Doing chin-ups on the handgrips.

Singing out loud, and

kindly sharing your music,

whether we want it or not.

Resting your newspaper

on top of my head, and

your laptop comfortably

on my knees.

Shovelling your food,

Slopping your drink and

filling the air with greasy aromas.

Picking your nose, and

wiping the results carefully

on the handgrips.

The more multitudinous you become

The more legs, and mouths and bottoms you have,

And yet how scarce your brains.


4 thoughts on “Monster in training

  1. You are so spot on with this. I was riding metro when pregnant, during my experience, no one but one lone woman during that entire experience ever stood up. And my experience was not unique. I spent hours venting with my daughter’s preschool teacher, whose wife was pregnant at the time that he had to bully people to give up their seat for her. Public transport–oddly brings out most people’s isolationist tendencies. While there are the odd good stories (I have one or two), its that need to cut off the world while we’re in the smack dab in the middle of it that makes it such an odd and conflicting human experience.

  2. Hahah – what a funny and scary beast! The thing that would always get to me would be those loud, self-assured voices while talking about absolutely nothing but it would be as if they were talking right into my ear (while of course I’d be trying to read)! 🙂

    • Yes! How do they talk at such length about nothing? Sometimes they make good character studies though!
      I did hear of someone, disturbed by a fellow commuter’s loud music, getting up and loudly reading her book out to him, since he was so keen on sharing.;)

      • That’s true – I probably should have listened more in case I wanted to write about a character who talked about nothing. But I guess that would be strange. That’s funny about reading the book out loud. I wonder if he even understood or if he just thought she was another random crazy person.

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